I knew it was only a matter of time this winter until I fell on my ass. I KNEW. I have YakTrax on my boots because it’s so damn icy everywhere, but inside it’s like you’re trying to walk around on ice skates—instant liability. And I literally cannot take them on and off my boots, because I don’t have the necessary range of motion.
So this morning I was taking the skyway between two buildings to get to a meeting because it was a fucking ice planet outside, the kind of place where you maroon New!Kirk, and I realized as I entered Building #2 that the skyway ends on a tiled ramp and I KNEW it was going to be super slippery but I wiped out ANYWAY.
I came down mainly on my tailbone, catching a small proportion of the impact with my right elbow, and then just kind of slithered into a prone position.
I then spent a minute or two cursing fate—honestly it didn’t really hurt after I landed, I was just pissed and residually frightened.
Then I realized that I couldn’t actually GET UP, because my hips and SI joints are already so fucked that getting out of bed in the morning requires me to swing my legs out and drop them into a vertical position to lever my torso up, which you really can’t do when you’re already on the floor.
So then I just… Lay there. Like a turtle. For several minutes, until a dude passed by and asked if I was all right, and helped me up as requested.
I was extra glad I was wearing a big bulky coat, not just for the cushioning but because I’m pretty sure he had no idea I was pregnant and thus did not make a fuss.
He was super hot and very polite, so I guess it could have been worse.
Let’s just hope I’m not immobilized tomorrow.
(I didn’t bother to call my doctor, because what was I gonna say? “I fell on my ass”? Fetus certainly doesn’t seem to care. I sent her an electronic message tonight about various non-urgent issues and did include a brief description of the fall, so I guess if she thinks it’s omg!important she’ll call.)