Telling your son not to “be such a girl” lets his sister who overhears the conversation know that being a girl is not a good thing and she should be sorry and ashamed of herself.
It also reminds your son that being a boy is better than being a girl and therefore he is better than any girl he will ever meet.
It also tells a daughter you have mistaken for a son that your love and respect are contingent on her never telling you who she is.
Dear former grad school classmate: Maybe you should hold off on musing about gender socialization until you can provide a non-asshole explanation for why, when your child apparently consistently identifies herself as a girl, you continue referring to her with masculine pronouns.
(Hint: There isn’t one.)
The Sociological Cinema
There was actually research that was done that found that women who used an “I have a boyfriend/husband” excuse to reject unwanted sexual attention and harassment by their bosses were more likely to be left alone than those who used any other excuse (including “I’m not interested”)
just a little additional note too:
this is why I hate those videos, vines, whatever of some random-ass dude approaching a girl on the street, asking her to go to his birthday party or be his friend, etc., and she immediately responds with “I have a boyfriend,” or “I’m married,” and the video is like, WOAH THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY GEEZ
and I’m thinking, no fucking shit. you walked up to a girl on the street out of nowhere, and started asking her to go with you to some place she doesn’t know, or start a relationship with her.automatically, her reaction in the kind of culture we live in (the kind where rape and harassment is commonplace) is to get away, you are a stranger. you have entered her personal space, and however “innocent” your request is, it’s still at least a minor threat to her.
so yeah, she’s going to say she has a boyfriend, or that she’s married, or that she’s seeing someone. she has learned, through numerous interactions with men who can’t take a hint, that this is the quickest way to get some douche off her back. it’s not about her being stuck-up for assuming that you want to bone her by asking her to your birthday party. it’s about you putting her in an extremely uncomfortable social situation, and her wanting to leave it.
and guess what? she has the right to do that.
Not here for any attempt to denigrate marginalized people for being competent social actors familiar with the norms that other people apply to them whether they like it or not.
When someone asks adult male fans to be respectful of the fact that a show is primarily meant for the entertainment and enrichment of young girls and the response is, “No, but you don’t understand, this show is actually high quality,” that’s… pretty revealing.
White men: Why the rest of us can’t have nice things since basically ever.
i cant believe a large group of adult men rigged a survey to vote for the best animated kids show of 2013 by creating scripts that automatically vote for my little pony a million times i feel like were living in a bizarro alternate universe of the real true timeline where bronies are fairytale creatures that only exist in legends
I know what you’re trying to do with this post, trying to make it sound so weird by saying all of these seemingly contradictory things, but I can very much so believe it, and your point kind of offends me, as an adult fan of animation. Because animation is fucking awesome.
It’s like your perspective here is from the late eighties or early nineties in every way which needs to be eradicated.
I think we should all be mature enough to admit that some cartoons are good, regardless of what age you are, and can still be enjoyed immensely.
The whole adult “men” portion of this is only screaming your own sexist ideals over this sort of thing, which I had hoped we’d clear up by now…
And as for the script, any large group that originated from, or hangs out around 4chan will do this. Like the time Oprah had the “Own your Own Show” thing, and they voted in whats-his-face that had cerebral palsy. (He was pretty awesome gta!)
It’s not surprising in the very least when you put in any kind of thought into it.
This is just your bitterness showing, that’s all. And I understand that, too, because honestly, I want another show to win….
Sorry I take everything too seriously.
No, you don’t take everything too seriously. You take a handful of specific things too seriously and clearly don’t take anything else nearly serious enough.
The fact that it’s utterly predictable that this would happen has nothing to do with anything. It’s still horrible, and it’s still wildly surreal when you look at it objectively.
If you put any thought into it… I mean, ANY thought, if you took anything half as seriously as you take defending your aggrieved sense of entitlement… you would understand that what the OP meant when they said “I can’t believe” isn’t “Wow, what are the odds?” but “How did we come to this point?”
And I tell you what, if you can point out where the OP said that animation isn’t awesome or said anything derogatory about animation, I will personally arrange for your favorite show to win. I don’t have an army of followers or the script expertise, but I will personally rearrange the universe atom by atom until we reach a configuration where this and every other fondest wish of your heart comes true.
I can’t do that, obviously, but that’s okay. You couldn’t show me where the OP was dumping on animation, either, because they weren’t.
You have completely missed the point of not only the original post but the criticism massed against bronies. You’re right, it’s not the 80s and 90s anymore and the landscape has changed with regards to animation. And one of the things that has changed is that you’re not some bleeding edge prophet crying alone in the wilderness when you say “Adults can like animation, too!” and “There are quality animated shows!” Everybody who grew up in the 80s and 90s is right there with you, probably including the OP.
But the fact that there is animated media aimed at adults (and/or the entire family) doesn’t mean that there is no longer a need for shows geared towards kids. Nor should the dividing line between “for kids” and “for adults” be quality. I mean, when you say things like “Of course adults like animated shows, there are GOOD ONES NOW”, it basically sounds like you think crap should be reserved for kids.
My Little Pony is a kids’ show. Does that mean that adults can’t watch it and enjoy it? No, not at all. It’s further a show that’s aimed at girls, with specific messages designed to counter the harmful messages that girls tend to receive from the other media offerings aimed at them. Does this mean guys can’t watch it? No, again, not at all.
Watch. Enjoy. Support.
But don’t take it away from the kids, especially the little girls. 90% of the world is yours. Almost everything in the entire world is aimed at (straight, white, cis) men ages 18 to 35. Even things that are aimed at other people are shaped by the views, tastes, and sensibilities of men ages 18 to 35.
The problem with bronies isn’t that cartoons are silly and meant for children. The problem with bronies isn’t that you’re watching something that wasn’t meant for you.
The problem with bronies is the sense of rampant entitlement. Everything else caters to you, so this thing must, too. Everything else belongs to you, so this thing must, too. Everything else is sexualized for your tastes, so this thing must be, too.
The bolded is why I hate bronies with every fiber of my being, as a mother of two girls who love the show, who also loves the show My Little Pony.
so i don’t think i posted it on here yet, but basically my lecture this week went terrible. the topic (as listed on the syllabus) was “case studies in racism: the american indian experience;” some of the lows of the class include 60-70 white kids yelling at me so loud that i had to yell at them to be quiet at the top of my voice, a white girl telling me she’s “5% Navajo” and that gives her the right to berate me in my own classroom, bizarre tone-policing, and multiple students trying to undermine me and belittle the material by saying things like “the Florida Seminole mascot is an accurate educational tool,” “you’re saying Native Americans are the only ones who experience racism and that’s racist,” “i’m not personally responsible for genocide or racism and i feel terrible about it, but i can’t change it so stop holding me accountable,” and my personal favorite, “you’re only saying this stuff because you’re Native and bitter—i don’t respect you and don’t wanna have this conversation, i don’t have to say shit.”
it was so bad that about 10-15 students (mostly students of color) came up to me after class to apologize for their classmates’ embarrassingly immature & racist behavior. one of them even said that the class was scary and he was surprised that i didn’t start crying halfway through the lecture. the one cool thing is that those select few students could point to their peers and say that they were an excellent example of how ingrained racism is—that people with passing grades in an ethnic studies class can still pull shit like that and think it’s ok shows that they’re regurgitating rhetoric and not processing this really, and that there’s still deep-rooted racism in that room.
i had expected some resistance, because this area has a history of pretty overt anti-Indian racism and this campus has not responded well. our ethnic studies department has no Native or indigenous faculty, and i’m the only Native grad student. there are 5 Native grad students total on this entire campus (we are a VERY large public land-grant institution in close proximity to quite a few large Native communities). last semester when a Native faculty member was beaten within an inch of his life just a block off campus, the university didn’t even send a press release or emergency notification for days. my department (ethnic studies) does not offer a grad-level Native or indigenous studies course, and does not require those who teach intro to ethnic studies to have a curriculum culturally sensitive to Native peoples. i asked my department head if i could be added to a faculty meeting agenda to discuss curricula changes and anti-Indian racism in our department, and i was told that was not the “appropriate forum,” and a (thus far unscheduled) private meeting would be best. in both undergrad and grad classes, each time we have had our 1 token reading or class period on “Native issues,” it’s gone terribly, i have been totally and openly disrespected, and i’ve left the class furious and hurt. in day to day interactions with colleagues, i have been told i’m “too ghetto for grad school,” that reservation Indians are lawless drug-addicted criminals, that if Native women don’t want to be raped they should leave their reservations, and that i bear the burden of on-demand proof of Native experiences of genocide.
i’m fed up, and i’m leaving. i was supposed to stay for my PhD (and was given funding to do so), but i’m graduating early with my MA and would not come back to this institution under any circumstance. my two-year stint here has been so traumatic, i’m taking a break from academia in general—i’m now working for an organization run by and for Native women, and am not planning on pursuing a PhD for a few years at least. this is not about painting myself as a victim, but to be real about how hostile a space as allegedly “radical” as an ethnic studies dept can be to Native students; for my own personal wellbeing, i have to take a breather from this shit. honestly, if i do go back into academia, i think in the long term my goal is to be teaching at a tribal college—i would rather be paid a third of what i could get teaching at a non-tribal institution and working with Native faculty & students, than deal with this shit on the regular for more money and recognition.
in the meantime, i have to teach intro to ethnic studies again next semester, as well as finish up TAing for it this semester. i’m completely rewriting my curriculum and while i wish it didn’t have to be this way, the repeated and consistent horrible experiences i’ve had have demonstrated that i have to treat that classroom like the battleground the students are making it into. it’s really unfortunate because that kind of atmosphere works to the detriment of all of us—it’s exhausting and traumatic for me, and not the ideal learning environment for them.
i have been begging and demanding support from faculty and administration essentially since day 1, and i have yet to see or hear anything from them at all except “wow that’s totally inappropriate i can’t believe it! so not ok, that needs to change!” (it should be noted these comments have not manifested any concrete changes in departmental or institutional curricula, dynamics, or accountability).
people do not want to be reminded of how ignorant they are, or how complicit in violence they are. i get it. but you’re losing dedicated scholars and educators like myself (and all the students i could have recruited or helped to retain!), and not only reinforcing colonial power structures and systems of domination, but perpetrating colonial/racist violence yourself.
please read every word of this and realize this woman’s experience is not the exception in academia—this is absolutely the rule. academia is one of the most virulently racist institutions i have ever personally experienced and it should be held accountable for the way it systematically drives out intelligent, passionate, and extraordinarily gifted marginalized students.
jeez i would love to order that thing online, but i don’t know what size to order it in because women’s clothing sizes are determined by the alignments of the planets in relation to the fuck you galaxy
…no, I don’t care if they have a size chart; every catalog size chart I’ve ever tried to use has been WOVEN FROM LIES BY LOKI.